Behind the Bedroom Door: Getting It, Giving It, Loving It, Missing It by Paula Derrow


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  • Pub. Date: December 2008
  • 334pp
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    Available in eBook$12.99
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    Product Details

    • Pub. Date: December 2008
    • Publisher:Random House Publishing Group
    • Format: Hardcover, 334pp

    The Barnes & Noble Review

    The roster of contributors to Paula Derrow's collection of tales about sex, relationships, and the many things in between is impressive for its intellect and sass. Here you will find women who say what you and yours have only thought, who use writerly metaphors to depict the tangles of being female, being a mother, being a lesbian, being young, being old, and, in all cases, being boldly vulnerable. Susan Cheever, Hope Edelman, and Lauren Slater are among the willing -- those who reveal their tastes and shortcomings through punchy stories. Cheever writes in praise of one-night stands, Edelman reflects on her teenage love affair with a bad boy turned groveling cheater, and Slater justifies sexless marriage. Reminiscent of the 2003 Bitch in the House anthology, Behind the Bedroom Door is every bit as scintillating, if not deliberately more sex-obsessed. What's most impressive is the candor that these women muster -- here are respected teachers, authors, and parents who tell their secrets as though their kids will never lay eyes on their tell-alls, who unabashedly relate the quirks of their husbands and lovers. But then again, what appears foolhardy may be just another act of modern living. Their kids and lovers will find out, or be shown again, that the women they love crave more, have qualms, and revel in their mistakes as much as their independence. This is a fun, helpful read for "ladies" of all ages, and for men who seek to understand. --Ariana Green

    More Reviews and Recommendations


    We may not admit it, but we’re all curious about what goes on in other people’s bedrooms. After all, we live in a world saturated with sex, which makes it tough not to wonder how we measure up—and even tougher to talk about our intimate experiences honestly. In this frank, poignant collection, twenty-six acclaimed writers go Behind the Bedroom Door and lay bare the messy, mind-blowing, often hilarious encounters that make up a woman’s history.

    By sharing their stories, authors like Susan Cheever, Hope Edelman, and Julie Powell bravely open a window on the passions, predilections and problems that we encounter between the sheets. In doing so, they reassure us that whatever we feel, whatever we do or don’t do in the bedroom, we’re not alone.

    Telling the truth about sex—how we like it, how often we get it, how it affects us—isn’t easy. This eye-opening anthology tells the truth about women’s intimate lives, shattering some deeply entrenched myths about what goes on in the bedrooms of real women along the way: Susan Cheever upends conventional notions about women, sex, and sentiment in her essay “In Praise of One-Night Stands.”… Sex is the last thing on Lauren Slater’s mind when the bestselling author and psychologist reveals a few surprising truths, even joys, about her virtually sexless marriage in “Overcome.”… Julie Powell serves up a searing chronicle of an illicit affair in “Lost in Space”; and novelist Valerie Frankel takes a decidedly lighter view in “Ouch, You’re Lying on My Hair.”

    Whether you’re twenty or seventy, single or perpetually coupled up, these frank, seriously sexy essays provide a deeply illuminating, ultimately comforting no-holds-barred look at our most private selves. Gutsy and provocative, they reveal a great deal about how far we’ve come—and how far we still have to go.

    The Washington Post - Lynn Harris

    …this diverse collection of well-crafted autobiographical essays serves as a reminder that our sex lives are not separate from the rest of our experiences. These writers explore unmet expectations, clumsy experimentation, abuse and addiction, illness and infertility and, yes, blinding, soaring lust. Some essays tread familiar territory…but with refreshing, spirited humor.

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    Editor Paula Derrow has worked for more than twenty years at a variety of magazines and other media, including Glamour, Harper’s Bazaar, and Lifetime Television. She is the articles director at Self magazine and teaches writing workshops for She lives in New York City.

    Customer Reviews

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    August 15, 2009: Captivating and creative. Incredibly honest. A must-read!

    It's great so far :)by ---Al---

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    January 20, 2009: There was an article in US Weekly magazine that had two stories from this book. One was extremely funny and I couldn't stop laughing! And the story was so true!! Even though I have only read some of it, I think that this would be a wonderful book.