Dream Upon Waking by Megan Hart

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Noa has carefully chosen her first lover, her ahavatara, from among the many at Somnus Keep who vie for the honor. Riordan de Cimmerian is the most powerful magicreator at the Keep and in the land, and joining with him will do more than release her innate magic powers. It will also tithe her soul to his. Riordan is not a kind man, nor a gentle one, but he is the man Noa has dreamed about for years. Now, she intends to turn those dreams into reality. Tonight, Noa will do more than reach her full magical strength. She will make Riordan hers...

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Cincinnati, Ohio, May 1853

In the eight years since she'd been at Somnus Keep, this was the first time Noa had been to this part of the manse. She'd followed the winding stone corridors and descended the curved stone stairways, and now she stood in front of a massive wooden door carved with all manner of designs. She'd stood before this door many times in her dreams, but the reality of it now made her heart thump fiercely in her chest.

Behind the door were the private chambers of Riordan de Cimmerian, Instructor Primus of Magical Theory and Practice. He was the most powerful magicreator in the realm. And her ahavatara. Her first lover.

She hesitated before knocking, though she'd planned this night for weeks. The time of her first flow had come and gone, and seven days had passed since the white cloth she pressed between her legs came back unstained. She'd had to wait much longer than other young women, most of whom earned the right to practice their magic by the age of ten and six. Noa was five years beyond that. The time had come to lose her virginity. After tonight, she'd not only be a woman, she'd be a full magicreator.

Still, though this moment had haunted her dreams for nearly five years, she almost turned around without knocking. She could make another choice ... find another man. She'd had many offers, for she was already an accomplished user of the low magic. The loss of her maidenhead would allow her to access the high magic, and the man who broke that barrier, her ahavatara, would gain some of the power for himself.

Before she could leave, the door swung open on silent hinges. Noa took adeep breath and stepped over the threshold. The door swung shut behind her. She heard the click of a lock, engaged by invisible hands. Despite herself, she jumped.

"Are you afraid of me?"

The voice, like smoke, curled out of the dimness toward her. Noa shut her eyes against its touch on her cheek, her throat, and the twin mounds of her breasts rising beneath the cloak. When she opened them, she saw him in his chair across the room.

"No, my lord."

His next words were spoken in a voice so cold it made an instant liar out of her. "Perhaps you should be."

Noa took a step toward him and passed through the haze in the air. She murmured a clearing spell under her breath, and the dust motes hanging in the candle's flickering glow moved aside to clear her view of him. He sat in his high backed chair, a sardonic smile on the mouth she'd tasted so many times in her dreams.

"My lord." Noa bowed her head. "If you would have me fear you, I will."

A low, rumbling chuckle curled through the air toward her. "Are those the games you'd like to play then?"

Without her even knowing he'd moved, he was next to her. Riordan lifted her chin until she looked up into the depths of his black eyes. His finger stroked the line of her jaw. Noa's knees shook, but she forced herself to stand firm.

With the quickness of a snake, Riordan's hands tangled in the lengths of her upswept hair. The fullness of it tumbled from its pins to cascade down her back and over her shoulders. Vanity swelled in her for a moment at how the sight of it made him run his tongue across his lips.

Then she gasped in pain, because he'd tightened his grip in the handful of hair at the base of her neck. He pulled her head back until she stared up at him. Noa felt her knees give way, and he pushed her to the stone floor in front of him without letting go of her hair.

"Should I make you kneel before me?" he asked as calmly as though he offered her a cup of wine. "Take out my cock and have you suck it? Push you down on the floor, spread wide your legs and ram my length inside you until you scream as I burst the precious veil of your maidenhood?"

Tears sprang to her eyes, but she forced herself to say, "If it would please you to do so, my lord."

He let go of her so abruptly she fell to the stones. Her hands slid over their smooth contours. She waited for his next command. This, too, she had dreamed.

Riordan sighed. "By the teeth of Adon'ai, girl. Get to your feet. I prefer a little more expertise in those who seek my bed. Go back to your classroom to your giggling girl friends. Make eyes at some young swain who will woo you with flowers and parlor magic."

Silently, her tears of pain turning to humiliation, she shook her head. She had chosen this man. She would have him.

"No? You defy me?"

Riordan stalked a few steps from her then turned to look back. Noa risked lifting her head to meet his leveled gaze.

"You've heard the tales, haven't you?" he asked her.

She nodded and got to her feet. She stood before him, hands clasped in front of her as she'd been taught. She did not flinch when his gaze swept over her. "I don't believe everything I hear, my lord."

He ran a hand through the dark thickness of his shoulder-length hair. The strands glimmered purple, green and blue in the candlelight, a sign of his power. Sparks jumped from the tips of his fingers and lit the planes of his face.

"I don't want to bed you, girl."

Now Noa set her jaw stubbornly. "I am not a girl any longer. And I've come to claim what's mine by right."

He stared at her for so long she thought he might explode in anger. When he spoke, his voice was soft, but deadly. She'd heard it before, when a student failed at some simple task. It was the calm before the storm.

"You know the consequences, don't you?"

She nodded. "But I will attain the high magic."

"You could do that with lesser men than I." Riordan slanted a sly smile across his full mouth. "Kinder men than I."

She stepped toward him. "I want you, my lord."

Her declaration seemed to stun him. "For the love of Adon'ai, why?"

Because I love you, she wanted to whisper, but did not. The words fluttered on her lips and passed silently from her mouth to dance among the golden motes of dust. She could not tell him the truth--that she'd watched him the past five years. That she'd sat in his classes and tried to concentrate on the spells he taught and not the way his hands would feel on her skin. She could not tell him that his face haunted her dreams, and the scent of him lingered in her nostrils even after he'd passed her in the hallways.

"Because you are a good teacher," she said at last.

He slid his fingers across his mouth then peered at her again. "And because I am the most powerful man in Somnus Keep? Because when I fuck you, you'll attain power most chits can only dream of?"

She shook her head. "I don't care about that."

"And you don't care that you'll link your soul with mine forever either?" Riordan's mouth twisted into a sneer.

I long for it, she wanted to say, but again kept silent. Noa's tongue swept along her lips in a nervous gesture, and she was rewarded when Riordan's hungry gaze fastened on her mouth. Her breath grew lighter, faster. Her breasts rose and fell beneath the weight of her cloak. She clenched her hands to keep them from trembling.

"I should turn you away," he said. "I have other occupations to fill my time this eve. I don't have time to waste on an untried girl with stars in her eyes..."

"You can't send me away. By Shalhevet's Mercy, you must take me because I am a virgin of common origin, and a magicreator. I can't afford the luxury of hiring a doxy to train me in the art of love."

"Shalhevet's Mercy?" Riordan shook his head. "Girl, that edict has not been enforced in nearly a hundred harvests. You know as well as I that you may choose your first partner from any one you like. Indeed, 'tis better if the first bond is one based on friendship or love, rather than simple attraction, because you will tithe your soul to the one who takes your virginity and gives you access to your full strength."

Noa lifted her chin. "Shalhevet's Mercy, my lord. I choose you."

Riordan went to his chair, a massive piece of furniture covered in studded velvet. The swish of his robes on the stones caressed her ears as it had so often when she sat in his classroom. Noa's nipples peaked, and warmth grew between her legs.

He expertly flicked the flowing cloth of his black cassock to prevent it from tangling as he sat. Riordan steepled his fingers under his chin and stared at her without speaking. Noa forced her back to remain stiff, though the way his eyes crawled over her cloaked form made doing so difficult. She wanted desperately to go to her knees before him to take him in her mouth as he'd so crudely offered already. The thought of it made the juncture of her thighs tingle. She bit back a sigh.

"Come here."

Could he read her mind? Noa did as she was bidden, her heart thumping like the sound of a thousand feet running on wooden floors. She kept her hands clasped in front of her, deferent, as she'd been taught.

"Get on your knees."

Oh, how many times she had longed to hear him say those words! So many times she'd dreamed of it as she touched herself in the loneliness of her narrow bed and tried to reach an ecstasy denied her. Noa slid gracefully to her knees in front of him. Her fingers pressed against the chilly stones. She could not bring herself to look at him, for fear her face would give away the intensity of her passion.

As if he could read her mind, Riordan tapped her head to make her look up. Noa felt the heat of a blush steal across her cheeks, and she couldn't stop her tongue from stealing across her lips again. Riordan made a low noise in his throat.

"Touch yourself."

Whatever command Noa had expected to hear, 'twas not that. Hesitantly, she lifted her hands to the swell of her breasts beneath her cloak. She rested her fingers there, conscious of the way her nipples nudged at the heavy fabric.

She dared not take her eyes away from his. He gazed at her with the familiar, sarcastic look she knew so well. She felt the heat on her face and between her thighs deepen. Noa bit her lip.

"Touch yourself as you do when you are alone. When you think about me."

Noa shuddered, not from fear or from cold, but from the fierce bolt of desire that shot through her. For a moment, she had to close her eyes against the way the room swam in front of her. Drops of sweat collected on her brow and at the nape of her neck, though the room was cool.

"I gave you an order, girl."

"My lord, I--"

"Question me and I'll put you from my sight. Do it."

With trembling hands, Noa spread her knees gently. The folds of her cloak fell into the space between her legs, protecting her from exposure. She touched herself through the fabric, twice.

"More."