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June 15, 2003: I'm a lawyer. I don't often find things to laugh about. So when Colleen Collins asked me to review one of her books to ensure legal accuracy, I approached it seriously...and ending up laughing my head off at her characters, her story. I haven't laughed like that since...not sure. Maybe since I saw Spinal Tap? Buy Let It Bree and Can't Buy Me Louie for a great read, a great laugh. Oh, and for its legal accuracy, too.
Loading..."Val -" She stopped and frowned. She lifted her gaze to meet his, but her head remained dipped. Being six feet tall,
she was accustomed to lowering - or as she preferred to call it, dipping - her head. Usually it just
reinforced that she was different - bigger, taller, more athletic - than other females.
But today, ready to say something that meant life or death - which to Bree meant Europe or Wyoming - dipping was
okay.
She stroked his chin, grappling for words. She'd never been a great talker. Action was more her style. "It's your
moment," Bree finally said. Darn, she'd found the words and now her voice was quavering. She eased in a calming breath.
"Our moment," she continued. "When you walk into the ring, be proud, majestic." She lowered her voice. "We both
know you're just an oversize puppy, but keep that part buried, deep, because right now, you're tough. Awesome
to the max. You're gonna blow them out of the stands -" She caught herself from adding, "and get me out of Chugwater."
But even without saying the words, she imagined Val understood what was in her heart. He was her one-way ticket to
freedom.
Emotion clogged Bree's throat. She swallowed hard, stuffing down the reality that escaping Chugwater also meant losing
Val. She shifted her gaze to his expansive chest so he wouldn't see tears were threatening to spill. She
refused to cry. That was for girls who played their emotions - and their charms - to manipulate people. Men,
in particular.
Not Bree. She prided herself on cutting to the chase. Raising her head, she patted Val's massive shoulder reassuringly.
"Come on, Hot Stuff, let's make you a star."
She led the way, her shoulders thrust back, her chin high. She wanted to look like a winner already - after all, the
stock show was getting radio and TV coverage throughout the Midwest.
The tang of animal sweat and hay saturated the air. As they headed into the arena, the crowd's buzz intensified,
reminding her of the time her crazy cousin Rupert stuck a twig in a hornets' nest, triggering a buzzing fury. Before
those ornery critters had a chance to attack, nine-year-old Bree was pumping her long legs, running for her life. It
hit her how, today, she was running again for her life. A new life. One where she could finally escape stuffy,
small-town Chugwater, Wyoming, and discover the world.
Behind her, Val pounded the dirt floor in giant, Olympian strides. Oh yeah, awesome to the max. After all, Valentine
Bovine was a major contender for the big prize - the Grand Champion Brahman bull.
Squinting against the glare of the overhead lights, Bree searched the stands. Under one of those Stetsons was Carlton
Rugg from Bovine Best, the internationally renowned cattle breeding organization. They had a stellar reputation, and
were known for their humane treatment of bulls, so she'd given them her verbal permission - an implied contract, not a
written one - to bid aggressively for Val should he win the championship.
And if he won, she'd win three hundred grand - maybe more! With that kind of prize money, she'd fly out of nowhere,
small-town Chugwater faster than a full-court slam. And Val would ease into the life of a full-time Romeo, making love
to lady bovines for the remainder of his days. They'd both be happy ... just happy in different parts of the world.
"Stepping into the arena, ladies and gentlemen," announced a baritone voice over the loudspeaker, "is Valentine
Bovine." Chuckles rippled through the crowd. Fighting her sadness, Bree forced a smile. She'd named her bull Valentine
because of the small white heart on his rear flank, and then she couldn't resist making his last name Bovine because of
its lilt. Her name, Bree Brown, lacked any lilt whatsoever, and she hated it. Her mother had named her after the
French cheese, brie, her grandmother had told her, but it wasn't until Bree was six months old that her mom had
realized she'd misspelled it. And Brown? That was about as boring and ordinary as Chugwater itself.
"Valentine, the fourth and last finalist, represents the senior bull champion division," continued the announcer, his
baritone voice reverberating through the speakers.
The crowd's incessant chatter prickled Bree's ears. She wiped at her suddenly hot, moist face and for a dizzying
moment, she thought she might keel over. She'd never been this freaked out in a volleyball competition - but then, no
single game had ever meant fulfilling her dream.
But in a sense, this was like a "single game" considering she'd only helped Mr. Connors, her neighbor back in
Chugwater, show his bulls in competition before. This time, with Val, was Bree's first solo showing, all on her own.
Keep it together. Stay focused. Bree tightened her hold on Val's leather halter, needing something to grip to
quell her adrenaline-crazed nerves. Just as she used to do in high-stress volleyball games, she took a few moments to
distract herself. In her mind's eye, she envisioned Mr. Connors, who'd bequeathed Val to her in his will last June,
seven months ago. It wasn't a surprise, really. After all, he'd let her name the bull the day it was born two and a
half years ago, when she was barely twenty-one. Mr. Connors's death hadn't been a surprise either, but she didn't want
to think about that now.
She swung her thoughts to Grams, with whom she'd always lived a few miles outside Chugwater. She had vague memories of
her father, who'd deserted them when she was two, and of her mother, who'd died when she was five.
The rest of Bree's family consisted of Aunt Mattie, Uncle Scott and three over-testosteroned cousins who lived next
door. But even with a large extended family, it was old Mr. Connors who'd become her best pal. He was the one she'd
entrusted with her most secret dream - one day to ride the Orient Express, the exotic and romantic train, through
Europe. A fantasy she'd never dared confess to anyone, especially not her Aunt Mattie, who still fretted that
Bree had earned a degree in art history rather than in something practical like accounting.
The announcer's voice jarred her thoughts. "Ladies and gentlemen, Doctor Marshall from Yuma, Arizona," he said,
reintroducing the grand-champion judge.
(Continues...)
Excerpted from Let It Bree/Can't Buy Me Louie
by Colleen Collins
Copyright © 2003 by Harlequin Enterprises, Ltd..
Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
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