Read an Excerpt
Gimme an O!
Chapter One
How to Drive Your Woman
Crazy With Passion!
Ten Surefire Steps to Keep Her Satisfied
All Night Long
Lecia Calhoun cringed as she read the heading of the chapterthat the radio host expected her to discuss...in full, juicy detail,no doubt...during her scheduled interview. An interviewthat was to take place in...she glanced at her watch...eightminutes and counting. And not just with any radio host, butwith Depraved Dave, arguably one of Los Angeles' most foulmouthed,irreverent talk show hosts. Loud and obnoxious, hewas the antithesis of the feminist, the kind of man's man whocommanded attention in the worst possible way. A chauvinistpig who believed that women had been put on Earth to servemen in general and him in particular. She wouldn't put it pasthim to roll off a woman and belch right after orgasm, or evento belch as he was coming. He was that kind of guy. A monthago at Spago Beverly Hills she had seen him stuff a tip down the hostess's blouse...groping the startled woman for a goodfew seconds...and he was at the restaurant with his wife.
She could only imagine how he would handle her now.
Knowing this was going to be her worst nightmare, Leciaagain glanced at the open book. The words How to Drive YourWoman Crazy with Passion! danced on the page, mocking her.Oh, yeah...she could imagine the fun Depraved Dave wouldhave at her expense. After all, she had written the words.
A part of her had held out hope that Depraved Davewouldn't earmark this chapter, because . . . well, because onecould entertain fantasies, couldn't they? Fantasies were a normal,healthy part of life. It was part ofwhat she preached inthis very book, which now felt like a cement block in herhands.
In reality, she was hoping that the universe would spareher this with Depraved Dave, simply because she had alreadydiscussed this very chapter with 99.9 percent of the hosts andreporters who had talked to her. It was the very last chapter inthe book, but the one the media were interested in. The onethat read like a tabloid sex column, a marked departure fromthe other chapters. The one that was thrown in half as a joke,but her editor had loved it nonetheless.
Given that she had discussed this chapter so many times,she knew she should be prepared for any question. But shehad not yet discussed it with Depraved Dave, whose middlename was Shocking. He poked fun even at the holiest of topics.She had once listened to his show in open-mouthed horroras he challenged nuns to "get laid" so they would knowexactly what they had given up.
Oh, God. How was she going to handle him?
Slinking down in the worn leather chair, Lecia lifted herface to Angela, the publicist who had accompanied her from her publishing house. Angela was a tall, pretty blonde whocould easily have been a model if she'd decided to pursue thatcareer. She was smiling and chatting with Joe Balfour, theproducer of Get Real with Dave.
"Um, excuse me. Angela . . . "
Angela glanced down at her. Lecia realized she must haveworn a petrified expression on her face, because Angela's eyesnarrowed with concern. "What's the matter? You need to usethe bathroom?"
"Not exactly." And thanks for saying that in front of Joe! "I, uh,need to speak with you for a moment." She paused. "Privately."
Joe's eyes flitted between both women. "No problem. Ineed to get some water anyway. I'll be back in a couple ofminutes to bring you in for the show."
Even though Lecia had heard the man speak already, Joe'svoice was still a shock to her. A shock because it told a lie.Deep and husky, it said he was at least six feet of well-muscledman. In reality, he was five-foot-four...max...and if he hadany rippling muscles, they were camouflaged by layers of fat.Yet Joe had an easy smile and a confident glint in his eyes thatsaid he thought he was as sexy as the Denzel Washingtonsand Brad Pitts of the world.
Lecia forgot about Joe the moment he left the room. Shewas on her feet in a flash, holding her book open for Angelato see. "Chapter Thirteen," she said, aware that her voice washigher than usual. "Depraved Dave wants me to discuss ChapterThirteen. You assured me we'd discuss something else!"
"I tried," Angela said. "I told Joe you'd been interviewedabout that chapter several times already, that I thought it'd bea more interesting slant to concentrate on another aspect ofthe book. Last I heard from him, he said Dave was more interested in you and your background. But what can I say?" Sheshrugged. "It's Dave's show. What he says goes."
"I can't do this," Lecia protested. "Not this chapter. Not withDepraved Dave."
Angela took a swig of her bottled water, but Lecia didn't missthe smirk before the plastic had hit her lips. "It'll be fine."
"And when he chews me to pieces before his male chauvinistaudience?"
"He won't be able to chew you to pieces. Everything yousay in the book is fact. Especially Chapter Thirteen. If you askme, it's high time men get it."
"Like that's gonna happen with his audience."
"Lecia?"
"Yeah?"
"Calm down. Honestly, there's no need to panic. You knowyour stuff, and when you're through with Depraved Dave,he'll know it, too."
"I'm not too sure about that."
"Stop stressing about it. No one's gonna remember whatyou said anyway. They'll tune in for one reason only...thetopic. Sex sells. Men are as intrigued by the female orgasm aswomen are. Which is exactly why your book is hot."
Gimme an O!. Copyright © by Kayla Perrin. Reprinted by permission of HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved. Available now wherever books are sold.
Read a Sample Chapter
Gimme an O
By Kayla Perrin HarperCollins Publishers, Inc.
Copyright © 2007 Kayla Perrin
All right reserved. ISBN: 9780061143878
Chapter One
How to Drive Your Woman
Crazy With Passion!
Ten Surefire Steps to Keep Her Satisfied
All Night Long
Lecia Calhoun cringed as she read the heading of the chapter that the radio host expected her to discuss--in full, juicy detail, no doubt--during her scheduled interview. An interview that was to take place in--she glanced at her watch--eight minutes and counting. And not just with any radio host, but with Depraved Dave, arguably one of Los Angeles' most foulmouthed, irreverent talk show hosts. Loud and obnoxious, he was the antithesis of the feminist, the kind of man's man who commanded attention in the worst possible way. A chauvinist pig who believed that women had been put on Earth to serve men in general and him in particular. She wouldn't put it past him to roll off a woman and belch right after orgasm, or even to belch as he was coming. He was that kind of guy. A month ago at Spago Beverly Hills she had seen him stuff a tip down the hostess's blouse--groping the startled woman for a good few seconds--and he was at the restaurant with his wife.
She could only imagine how he would handle her now.
Knowing this was going to be her worst nightmare, Lecia again glanced at the open book. The words How to Drive Your Woman Crazy with Passion! danced on the page, mocking her. Oh, yeah--she could imagine the fun DepravedDave would have at her expense. After all, she had written the words.
A part of her had held out hope that Depraved Dave wouldn't earmark this chapter, because . . . well, because one could entertain fantasies, couldn't they? Fantasies were a normal, healthy part of life. It was part of what she preached in this very book, which now felt like a cement block in her hands.
In reality, she was hoping that the universe would spare her this with Depraved Dave, simply because she had already discussed this very chapter with 99.9 percent of the hosts and reporters who had talked to her. It was the very last chapter in the book, but the one the media were interested in. The one that read like a tabloid sex column, a marked departure from the other chapters. The one that was thrown in half as a joke, but her editor had loved it nonetheless.
Given that she had discussed this chapter so many times, she knew she should be prepared for any question. But she had not yet discussed it with Depraved Dave, whose middle name was Shocking. He poked fun even at the holiest of topics. She had once listened to his show in open-mouthed horror as he challenged nuns to "get laid" so they would know exactly what they had given up.
Oh, God. How was she going to handle him?
Slinking down in the worn leather chair, Lecia lifted her face to Angela, the publicist who had accompanied her from her publishing house. Angela was a tall, pretty blonde who could easily have been a model if she'd decided to pursue that career. She was smiling and chatting with Joe Balfour, the producer of Get Real with Dave.
"Um, excuse me. Angela . . . "
Angela glanced down at her. Lecia realized she must have worn a petrified expression on her face, because Angela's eyes narrowed with concern. "What's the matter? You need to use the bathroom?"
"Not exactly." And thanks for saying that in front of Joe! "I, uh, need to speak with you for a moment." She paused. "Privately."
Joe's eyes flitted between both women. "No problem. I need to get some water anyway. I'll be back in a couple of minutes to bring you in for the show."
Even though Lecia had heard the man speak already, Joe's voice was still a shock to her. A shock because it told a lie. Deep and husky, it said he was at least six feet of well-muscled man. In reality, he was five-foot-four--max--and if he had any rippling muscles, they were camouflaged by layers of fat. Yet Joe had an easy smile and a confident glint in his eyes that said he thought he was as sexy as the Denzel Washingtons and Brad Pitts of the world.
Lecia forgot about Joe the moment he left the room. She was on her feet in a flash, holding her book open for Angela to see. "Chapter Thirteen," she said, aware that her voice was higher than usual. "Depraved Dave wants me to discuss Chapter Thirteen. You assured me we'd discuss something else!"
"I tried," Angela said. "I told Joe you'd been interviewed about that chapter several times already, that I thought it'd be a more interesting slant to concentrate on another aspect of the book. Last I heard from him, he said Dave was more interested in you and your background. But what can I say?" She shrugged. "It's Dave's show. What he says goes."
"I can't do this," Lecia protested. "Not this chapter. Not with Depraved Dave."
Angela took a swig of her bottled water, but Lecia didn't miss the smirk before the plastic had hit her lips. "It'll be fine."
"And when he chews me to pieces before his male chauvinist audience?"
"He won't be able to chew you to pieces. Everything you say in the book is fact. Especially Chapter Thirteen. If you ask me, it's high time men get it."
"Like that's gonna happen with his audience."
"Lecia?"
"Yeah?"
"Calm down. Honestly, there's no need to panic. You know your stuff, and when you're through with Depraved Dave, he'll know it, too."
"I'm not too sure about that."
"Stop stressing about it. No one's gonna remember what you said anyway. They'll tune in for one reason only--the topic. Sex sells. Men are as intrigued by the female orgasm as women are. Which is exactly why your book is hot."
Continues...
Excerpted from Gimme an O by Kayla Perrin Copyright © 2007 by Kayla Perrin. Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
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