Why Him? Why Her?: Finding Real Love by Understanding Your Personality Type by Helen Fisher

From Barnes & Noble

Don't be fooled by the subtitle: The words "Soul Mate" evoke ominous images of cosmic synchronicity, compatibilities far beyond the reach of mortal man -- and woman. Fortunately, author Helen Fisher isn't peering into any crystal balls in this book. Instead, she bases Why Him? Why Her? on her detailed personality study of 40,000 adults, an investigation that helped her ferret out the real chemistry between potential life partners.

From the Publisher

A groundbreaking book about how your personality type determines who you love

Why do you fall in love with one person rather than another? In this fascinating and informative book, Helen Fisher, one of the world’s leading experts on romantic love, unlocks the hidden code of desire and attachment. Each of us, it turns out, primarily expresses one of four broad personality types—Explorer, Builder, Director, or Negotiator—and each of these types is governed by different chemical systems in the brain. Driven by this biology, we are attracted to partners who both mirror and complement our own personality type.

Until now the search for love has been blind, but Fisher pulls back the curtain and reveals how we unconsciously go about finding the right match. Drawing on her unique study of 40,000 men and women, she explores each personality type in detail and shows you how to identify your own type. Then she explains why some types match up well, whereas others are problematic. (Note to Explorers: be prepared for a wild ride when you hitch your star to a fellow Explorer!) Ultimately, Fisher’s investigation into the complex nature of romance and attachment leads to astonishing new insights into the essence of dating, love, and marriage.

Based on entirely new research—including a detailed questionnaire completed by five million people in thirty-three countries—Why Him? Why Her? will change your understanding of why you love him (or her) and help you use nature’s chemistry to find and keep your life partner.

Erica L. Foley - Library Journal

Fisher (anthropology, Rutgers Univ.; Why We Love) presents her research for Chemistry.com on personality types and long-term relationships. Paralleling the theories of Hippocrates, Carl Jung, David Keirsey, and others, she posits that people fall into four different groups of inherited temperament: explorers, builders, directors, and negotiators. She offers a test for readers to find their type and thoroughly explains the traits of each temperament and the corresponding chemicals and hormones. To illustrate these traits, Fisher assigns well-known historical figures to the types. Next, readers learn what each type is looking for in a mate, what sort of connection the different types hope to make, and how they behave in dating and relationships. Fisher explores each of the ten possible relationship combinations of the four types, describing strengths and pitfalls of each. There is also a section on the biology of first impressions and early dating behaviors. Readers seeking a long-term relationship will be interested in Fisher's ideas, and her book is recommended for larger public libraries.

Product Details

• Table of Contents

Table of Contents