What the Hell Is a Groom and What's He Supposed to Do? by John Mitchell, Alan Mitchell

From the Publisher

Ten Reasons Why a Woman Should Buy This Book for Her Fiancé

• 1. Finally there is a book that strong-arms your fiancé into fully understanding that during the engagement, you're the most important person, you get to plan the wedding your way, and he cannot argue with that -- at all.
• 2. Author John Mitchell gives you permission to tag along with your beloved when he is selecting a tux; snaps for the author because now you know your fiancé will look great!
• 3. If you happen to plan ahead and give this to your future groom before he pops the big question, he will understand a few things: that size (and quality) really does matter when you're talking about rings, that he has to get down on one knee when he proposes, and that romance is key. Remember No. 1?
• 4. If you love PeptoBismol pink and your groom hates it, don't worry. As Mitchell says, "the wedding is for her, not for you."
• 5. All women love chocolate or some concoction of it, and Mitchell makes sure your fiancé knows it.
• 6. If your fiancé reads this book, there is no chance that he will miss the wedding or show up hungover and bleary-eyed because of a bachelor party the night before -- his drunken stupor will occur weeks before.
• 7. Your honey will learn how to charm not only you but also your parents and his. Mitchell encourages your fiancé to send bouquets of flowers after the wedding as a way of saying thanks.
• 8. Mitchell dissects what he calls PMS 2 -- Premarital Stress -- and tells the groom that no matter what happens, be patient and don't get offensive toward the bride. (In other words, girls, this is like a Monopoly Get Out of Jail Free card letting you be a little more bitchy than usual.)
• 9. With this book in your pocket, you can let your boyfriend feel like he's in control even when he's not.
• 10. Really, there's no need to have made a list about why a woman should buy this book beyond reason No. 1. Doesn't it just say it all?

• Ten Reasons Why a Man Should Buy This Book for Himself

  • 1. Mitchell compares everything with sports.
  • 2. If you read this book, there's no way you can screw up. From ring shopping to the honeymoon vacation, Mitchell has outlined what you have to do, right down to how big your smile has to be at what moment.
  • 3. You have some clout when registering for gifts: You can choose electronics and sports equipment, not just dishes and linens.
  • 4. According to this book, you technically don't have to write the thank-you notes. That responsibility almost always falls under the future wife's realm.
  • 5. There are "brownie points" noted throughout, a.k.a. ways for you to seem like Prince Charming to your honey, even if you're really the Tasmanian devil in disguise.
  • 6. Wedding showers are meant for women, not men, and even if your bride-to-be tries to convince you otherwise, you've got proof, in writing, saying that it really should be an all-estrogen affair.
  • 7. You get to sign a "first right of refusal," which states that while the bride is obligated to pick the products and services she wants, ultimately you can veto anything if, and only if, you absolutely hate it.
  • 8. Mitchell details what your responsibilities are and what the bride's responsibilities are. To give you the quick summation: Complain only when something is absolutely awful, show up at your wedding sober, and plan the honeymoon. Thought you'd like this author!
  • 9. This book is a quick read. It's no Tom Wolfe book that you're going to dish out lots of money for and have a hard time completing.
  • 10. You will make your fiancée very, very happy if you follow the directions in this book. And after all, isn't that what a wedding is all about?

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