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Bill Alexander had no idea that his simple dream of having a vegetable garden and small orchard in his backyard would lead him into life-and-death battles with groundhogs, webworms, weeds, and weather; midnight expeditions in the dead of winter to dig up fresh thyme; and skirmishes with neighbors who feed the vermin (i.e., deer). Not to mention the vacations that had to be planned around the harvest, the near electrocution of the tree man, the limitations of his own middle-aged body, and the pity of his wife and kids. When Alexander runs (just for fun!) a costbenefit analysis, adding up everything from the live animal trap to the Velcro tomato wraps and then amortizing it over the life of his garden, it comes as quite a shock to learn that it cost him a staggering $64 to grow each one of his beloved Brandywine tomatoes. But as any gardener will tell you, you can't put a price on the unparalleled pleasures of providing fresh food for your family.
Indeed, the book is one long horticultural midlife crisis, or else Genesis: The Sequel -- what would have happened had God decided to employ Adam as a gardener and transmuted Eve's lust into a predilection for bottling fruit. At one point Alexander wonders, "Am I becoming my garden, or is my garden becoming me?" It is a question that will resonate with many gardeners.
More Reviews and RecommendationsWilliam Alexander has been gardening and small-scale farming for over twenty-five years. He lives with his wife and their two children in New York’s Hudson Valley.
Number of Reviews: 3
Average Rating:
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A reviewer
Terry Reed Goodman, I search for good books with humor, 12/14/2007
Whether you actually garden and or farm or simply appreciate a well written book,this book is a MUST. As an armchair gardener familiar with David Austin roses, the joys of having outstanding tomato plants, the ability to share the bounty with others, and being educated about the perils of the pests encountered and the answers, I can tell you that you will have a Marvelous experience reading this funny funny funny book, which has historical data, current treatments for gardening problems and a healthy family situation. With many many many laugh out loud moments, this book captures whimsy and the desire of a person to improve his and her own property with complete persistence and dedication.
Also recommended: The other Gardening book I highly recommend is Passalong Plants, which was my all time favorite gardening book until I read The $ 64.00 Tomato. Perfect guest room books.
Laugh out loud funny!
Holly's mom
(simonsdad_2000@yahoo.com)
, trying to be a gardener!, 05/11/2006
Absolutely hysterical! If you've ever tried any type of gardening you'll be able to relate to the author's trials & tribulations. Some of the phrases he uses made me laugh out loud & some of the other material is thought-provoking & makes you really ponder things. If you're having a bad day & need a good laugh, read this book! Well done!!
More Customer ReviewsBill Alexander had no idea that his simple dream of having a vegetable garden and small orchard in his backyard would lead him into life-and-death battles with groundhogs, webworms, weeds, and weather; midnight expeditions in the dead of winter to dig up fresh thyme; and skirmishes with neighbors who feed the vermin (i.e., deer). Not to mention the vacations that had to be planned around the harvest, the near electrocution of the tree man, the limitations of his own middle-aged body, and the pity of his wife and kids. When Alexander runs (just for fun!) a costbenefit analysis, adding up everything from the live animal trap to the Velcro tomato wraps and then amortizing it over the life of his garden, it comes as quite a shock to learn that it cost him a staggering $64 to grow each one of his beloved Brandywine tomatoes. But as any gardener will tell you, you can't put a price on the unparalleled pleasures of providing fresh food for your family.
Indeed, the book is one long horticultural midlife crisis, or else Genesis: The Sequel -- what would have happened had God decided to employ Adam as a gardener and transmuted Eve's lust into a predilection for bottling fruit. At one point Alexander wonders, "Am I becoming my garden, or is my garden becoming me?" It is a question that will resonate with many gardeners.
When the author of this hilarious horticultural memoir plants a large vegetable garden and a small orchard on his Hudson Valley farmstead, he finds himself at odds with almost all creation. At the top of the food chain are the landscaping contractors, always behind schedule, frequently derelict, occasionally menacing. Then there are the herds of deer that batter the electrified fence to get at Alexander's crop, and the groundhog who simply squeezes between the wires, apparently savoring the 10,000-volt shocks. Most insidious are the armies of beetles, worms, maggots and grubs that provoke Alexander, initially an organic-produce zealot, into drenching his entire property with pesticides. He braves these trials, along with hours of backbreaking labor and the eye-rolling of his wife and children, for the succulence of homegrown food. He also manages to maintain a sense of humor, riffing on everything from the ugliness of garden ornaments to the politics of giving away vegetables to friends. Alexander's slightly poisoned paradise manages to impart an existential lesson on the interconnectedness of nature and the fine line between nurturing and killing. (Apr. 14) Copyright 2005 Reed Business Information.
Alexander writes the engaging tale of one man's pursuit of the perfect kitchen garden, from its original construction, fraught with delays and construction troubles, to his cost-benefit analysis that reveals each tomato he raised set him back $64. Along the way, we see him battle weeds, try to outsmart local wildlife, and solve the mystery of why his corn is falling over. We also watch him, a man who wants to grow organic produce, come to the sobering realization that he must use pesticides if he wants to harvest any apples at all. Canning produce goes from being a novelty to a chore, and his meadow doesn't turn out quite as he envisioned it. Whether sharing the story of his and his wife's garden statue debate or of the herniated disk that will change his gardening life forever, Alexander reveals himself to be a passionate gardener. This enjoyable book, laced with humor and Alexander's garden philosophy, is highly recommended for public and horticultural libraries.-Sue O'Brien, Downers Grove P.L., IL Copyright 2005 Reed Business Information.
Adult/High School-Alexander had always dreamed of having his own garden, where he could grow healthy, organic fruits and vegetables. When his family moved to the Hudson Valley, he got his wish-there was more than enough land for his vegetable garden, his apple orchard, his wife's flower garden, and a swimming pool. He had done his research and knew which crops to plant and when, what type of fencing he'd need, and how to defend his garden against predators. What he hadn't counted on were the facts that planting sod around the swimming pool killed the corn, and that planting rosebushes killed the sod. There were also landscaping contractors always behind schedule, a groundhog that figured out how to get through a 10,000-electric-volt fence, and feasting deer. After years of fighting pests, Alexander realized that there was no such thing as an organic garden in the Northeast, and that for each tomato he'd taken from his garden he'd spent $64; ultimately, what was once a hobby became a second full-time job. Throughout the telling, the author manages to maintain a sense of humor, riffing on everything from the ugliness of garden ornaments to the politics of giving away vegetables to friends. This hilarious horticultural memoir manages to impart an existential lesson on the interconnectedness of nature and the fine line between nurturing and killing. Teens looking for a biography, a book on biology, or a humorous read can't go wrong with this title.-Erin Dennington, Chantilly Regional Library, Fairfax County, VA Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.
Perfectionist, aiming to subdue nature with constant gardening, reaps object lessons by the bushel. When Alexander employed a professional designer to install a terraced garden plot on his newly purchased hilltop home in New York's Hudson Valley, his motivations included the production of vegetables and fruit for the family table, everything strictly organic, pesticide-free, grown using top-of-the-line heirloom seeds, etc. Abetted and occasionally thwarted by wife Anne, a physician who immediately staked out a portion of the garden for flowers (and reserved the bulk of her own precious spare time for them), Alexander embarked on an epic struggle. His book records all the run-ins with variously eccentric and even hostile suppliers and contractors, plus his many misconceptions and foibles. For example, the depredations of deer and a determined groundhog prompted the installation of an electric fence. Aghast, the author watched as the groundhog, dubbed Superchuck, simply absorbed the shocks to wriggle through to his prize crops; when Alexander juiced up the system with a more powerful capacitor, Superchuck learned to time the intervals between pulses. It gradually dawned on the author that he was dealing with a complex and delicate ecosystem, a fact brought stunningly home when the planting of a mere four rosebushes brought in a Japanese beetle horde to ravage the property, and when turf webworms unwittingly imported along with a new lawn eventually brought down the corn in the field. After tallying the expenses for one bad season, the 19 Brandywine tomatoes picked proved to have cost $64 apiece. An amusing compilation of do's and don'ts for aspiring gardeners afflicted with hubris.
“Nature is meant to be accommodated, not dominated, and The $64 Tomato is William Alexander’s insightful and often hilarious voyage to that discovery. With self-deprecating wit, he spins an engaging tale that teaches important lessons as it entertains.” – John Grogan, author of Marley & Me
Number of Reviews: 3
Average Rating:
![]()
Write a Review
A reviewer
Terry Reed Goodman, I search for good books with humor, 12/14/2007
Whether you actually garden and or farm or simply appreciate a well written book,this book is a MUST. As an armchair gardener familiar with David Austin roses, the joys of having outstanding tomato plants, the ability to share the bounty with others, and being educated about the perils of the pests encountered and the answers, I can tell you that you will have a Marvelous experience reading this funny funny funny book, which has historical data, current treatments for gardening problems and a healthy family situation. With many many many laugh out loud moments, this book captures whimsy and the desire of a person to improve his and her own property with complete persistence and dedication.
Also recommended: The other Gardening book I highly recommend is Passalong Plants, which was my all time favorite gardening book until I read The $ 64.00 Tomato. Perfect guest room books.
Laugh out loud funny!
Holly's mom (simonsdad_2000@yahoo.com), trying to be a gardener!, 05/11/2006
Absolutely hysterical! If you've ever tried any type of gardening you'll be able to relate to the author's trials & tribulations. Some of the phrases he uses made me laugh out loud & some of the other material is thought-provoking & makes you really ponder things. If you're having a bad day & need a good laugh, read this book! Well done!!
Gardener's Struggle our Gain
JF, A reviewer, 04/16/2006
“The $64 Tomato” at first glance may seem to be simply a gardening book. However, once you take a glance inside, you’ll find William Alexander’s story a funny and insightful tale of the author’s ongoing attempt to gain a modicum of control over his fate – in Alexander’s case aptly represented by his own backyard garden. “Tomato” is as much about the struggle of a man with his nature, as man against nature. Whether trying to outsmart an alpha groundhog (which Alexander, with an appropriate, if not appreciative, nod to a formidable opponent, names SuperChuck), or contending with bizarre contractors(one of whom bears a striking resemblance to the actor Christopher Walken) or reassuring his wife and kids of his sanity after wandering through his garden in January, Alexander keeps us asking “Is it really right to be so entertained by someone’s angst?” and “Why am I laughing out loud when he is hurting the most?”. In between all of this, we learn fascinating facts about the food we usually take for granted. For instance, Alexander informs us the tomato originated in Central America with the Aztecs, was hauled off to Europe by Cortez and the conquistadors, returned 300 years later to the New World with the colonists, and was finally promoted to culinary prominence by none other then Thomas Jefferson. “The $64 Tomato” is both a funny and thought-provoking examination of how much emotional upheaval, consternation, and struggle we willingly endure in pursuit of our most cherished pastimes. In Alexander’s case, it’s so called “weekend” gardening.” Whether you are into gardening or just an observer of people and their foibles, “The $64 Tomato” may not compel you to rush out and buy a hoe and wheelbarrow. But it will undoubtedly leave you thinking about your own favorite obsessions and compulsions in an entirely new light.
Also recommended: The Constant Gardener, Country Matters, House
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