DELIVERY & GIFT DETAILS:
Available for Pre-Order
This item will be available on December 28.
Eligible for gift wrap & gift message.
(Other Format)
Reader Rating: (111 ratings)
Detailed Rating: "Originality" See All
| More Formats | |
|---|---|
| Available in eBook | $9.99 |
| Hardcover | $20.00 |
Reminiscent of Keith Donohue's The Stolen Child, Erick Setiawan's richly atmospheric debut is a beautiful, engrossing fable of three generations of women in two families; their destructive jealousies, their loves and losses, their sacrifices and deeply rooted deceptions, and their triumphs.
Of Bees and Mist is the tale of Meridia -- raised in a sepulchral house where ghosts dwell in mirrors, she spends her childhood feeling neglected and invisible. Every evening her father vanishes inside a blue mist without so much as an explanation, and her mother spends her days venomously beheading cauliflowers in the kitchen. At sixteen, desperate to escape, Meridia marries a tenderhearted young man and moves into his seemingly warm and charming family home. Little does she suspect that his parents are harboring secrets of their own. There is a grave hidden in the garden. There are two sisters groomed from birth to despise each other. And there is Eva, the formidable matriarch whose grievances swarm the air like an army of bees. In this haunting story, Setiawan takes Meridia on a tumultuous ride of hope and heartbreak as she struggles to keep her young family together and discovers long-kept secrets about her own past as well as the shocking truths about her husband's family.
Readers of magic-realist fiction will instantly be captivated by this richly evocative fairy tale. Of Bees and Mist takes place in a nameless town during a timeless era, where spirits and spells, witchcraft and demons, ghosts and clairvoyance -- both real and imagined -- are an everyday reality. Setiawan skillfully blends the real and the fantastical as he follows our heroine over a 30-year time span in which her love, courage, and sanity are tested to the limit.
Setiawan's debut novel spans 30 years in this heartfelt magical-realist story of two rival families living in a mystical world that transcends both time and place. Meridia is a lonely child; a mysterious incident when she was an infant has torn apart her parents, leaving them sharing nothing but a cold, mist-filled home. Not until Meridia meets the charmer Daniel, at age 16, does she finally feel loved. They marry and move in with his family and at first Meridia loves her life in Daniel's home. But she quickly learns of matriarch Eva's deceitful, manipulative ways and her power, both natural and supernatural, which she uses to control her family. When Meridia rebels against Eva, finding unexpected support from her parents, the rivalry solidifies and a lifelong battle begins. As time passes, Meridia faces heartbreak and betrayal, becoming a strong, fiercely independent woman. While filled with fortune-tellers, ghosts and unexplained phenomena, the relationships between the various characters are true to life so that fans of fantasy and fiction lovers alike are sure to enjoy this magical tale. (Aug.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. More Reviews and RecommendationsIndonesian-born novelist Erick Setiawan is a former software engineer-turned-writer whose first novel, the richly atmospheric fable Of Bees and Mist, was published in 2009.
More About the AuthorReader Rating:
See Detailed Ratings
October 20, 2009: Of Bees and Mist falls into the 'magic-realist' fiction category and I have to say, that I don't think that I have ever read a book quite like this one. Meridia falls in love with Daniel and moves into his family's home. There she encounters Eva, the mother-in-law from hell. Eva is so wicked and vile that when she goes to work on you, bees fly out of her mouth to attack you. Needless to say, her words sting quite a bit. Elias, her husband is good at heart, but has a terrible time living with his wife and fights are a daily occurrence. At first, Meridia tries her best to get along with her mother-in-law, but all that ends when she has her own child and sees Eva for who she really is. This of course causes all sorts of problems between Meridia and her husband, Daniel.
Reading this book was like taking a trip to the circus. Not the circus you and I know today, but a circus from years past. The colorful tents, the jugglers, the musicians, the smell of circus food wafting in the air. This book had a FEELING to it. Every time I picked it up I felt as if I was taken back in time to this magical place. I really enjoyed it.The only criticism I have is that the Meridia/Eva battle seemed to go on a tad too long and it sort of overshadowed the interactions between some of the other characters. Overall, I was charmed by this book and wonder what Erick Setiawan is working on next.Reader Rating:
See Detailed Ratings
October 17, 2009: I got this book in First Look Bookclub and have to say I liked it too much. What to say of a woman who buzzes like bees and a house full of mists? A man who hates his child and for years doesn't talk to his wife? A mysterious atmospehere rounds all the book. If you like stories full of magical powers, fables, rounded of adventures, love and overcomings so this is the story you have to read. An absorbing book!
Name:
Erick Setiawan
Current Home:
San Francisco, CA
Date of Birth:
February 15, 1975
Place of Birth:
Jakarta, Indonesia
Education:
B.A. in Psychology & B.S. in Computer Science, Stanford U., 1998; M.S. in Computer Science, Stanford U., 2000
Erick Setiawan was born in 1975 in Jakarta, Indonesia, to Chinese parents. A quiet, shy child, he was thankfully raised in a family of gifted storytellers, who taught him that while life might have an endless supply of conflict, not all of it translates into a good story. Due to the anti-Chinese sentiment prevalent in Indonesia, his childhood was often fraught with tension, which prompted him to take comfort in books and in the world of his imagination. To traumatize him further, his parents sent him to Catholic schools, where he learned from an early age to feel guilty about everything and that a grown man in a sash and a swishing robe with a ruler in his hand was in no way maternal.
At age sixteen, he left his family and moved to the United States. He knew three people and barely spoke English, yet was somehow convinced that he could compete with the top students to get into the best colleges. His resolution/delusion pushed him to work hard. The following year, his first choice, Harvard, rejected him, but fortunately Stanford had a lower standard. To this day, he believes that they admitted him by mistake.
In college, he wanted to study English, but his shyness and insecurity about his adopted language prevented him from enrolling in classes that required him to speak. Instead, he chose to major in Psychology and Computer Science, going as far as getting a Master's in the latter. Bafflingly enough, studying about mental disorders and complex algorithms only increased his hunger for literature. Once too often, he shuffled aside his term papers and problem sets to lose himself in a novel.
After graduation, he began his tenure as a software engineer in San Francisco. By the end of the first year, he knew that his heart was not in it. Confronted with the risk of being a corporate burnout at twenty-six, he turned to writing in his spare time. To the exasperation of his bosses, he began coming to work late and taking longer and longer lunch breaks in order to write. Several years, two failed novels, and countless short stories later, he decided to quit his job to finish writing Of Bees and Mist. At the time, he had no book deal and knew no one in publishing, but he pursued his passion with the same stubborn resolution/delusion that had motivated him earlier. He sold Of Bees and Mist four years after he started it.
Some interesting outtakes from our interview with Erick Setiawan:
"I sing Richard Marx at karaoke. Still."
"Before I devoted all my waking hours to finishing Of Bees and Mist, I was a software engineer. In order to write, I would come to work late and leave early, not counting the ungodly long lunch hours I pilfered from my bosses. Yet instead of firing me, they kept promoting me and giving me raises! I remain boggled to this day."
"When I lived in Indonesia, I fought with my parents for two years before they finally let me go to America at age sixteen. For reasons best known to themselves, many people tried their hardest to stop my parents. There was one woman who supposedly graduated from Harvard and who took it upon herself to scare my mother to death. She said that the streets of the U.S.A. were teeming with drug dealers, gangsters, and serial killers—all of which could be easily confirmed by a viewing of Taxi Driver and The Silence of the Lambs. But the worst part of it, she said, were American women. 'They'll weave their many webs around your son and seduce him,' she told my mother. 'Once they have him trapped, they'll suck him dry and leave him broken and overdosed on the street.' I don't know which Harvard she went to, but it sure was a good thing that I didn't listen to her!"
"I consider it both a lifelong pleasure and a non-negotiable necessity to be a reader. I don't understand people who don't—or won't—read, or those who prefer TV to books. And to write is the absolute thrill and privilege for me. Most mornings, I wake up not knowing if I'm Chinese, Indonesian, or American, and it is only through writing that I can create a landscape in which someone like myself would feel at ease and not be branded a foreigner. Books have no borders, no locks, no exclusionary policies. I feel incredibly blessed and grateful to be in this position. Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy Of Bees and Mist!"
What are your ten favorite books, and what makes them special to you?
What are some of your favorite films, and what makes them unforgettable to you?
My favorite film of all time is Wong Kar-wai's In the Mood for Love. Set in 1960s Hong Kong, it is a stylish and elegantly atmospheric masterpiece about betrayal, unrequited longing, societal restrictions, and the choices that inevitably drive people apart. All of this is excellent, yet the movie also touched me on a very personal level: It was the first movie that challenged the way I thought about my Chinese heritage. I am a full-blooded Chinese, but I was born and raised in Indonesia. Because of the political situations in that country, I had to disown my Chinese identity for most of my life, and I was often ashamed of it. I grew up with the horrible stereotypes that Chinese people were crass, uncouth, unsophisticated, and lacking in taste and refinement. And then I saw this movie and I saw the resplendent Maggie Cheung -- now my favorite actress -- walk up and down those stairs in the rain in those beautifully-fitting dresses with the loneliest expression on her face, and my prejudice was torpedoed to pieces. This film showed me that being Chinese does not preclude being elegant, sophisticated, sexy, or heartbreaking. The mournful, nostalgic soundtrack brilliantly reinforced the sentiment, as did the dashing Tony Leung (who won the Best Actor award at Cannes for his role).
Taxi Driver. Gritty, shocking, frightening, and redemption, when it comes, takes place in a bloodbath. All in all, a great American story. When my family saw this movie in Indonesia, they thought that every other man in America was a pimp, a pedophile, or a homicidal maniac. In order to prevent protracted visits, I have yet to disabuse them of this notion.
What types of music do you like? Is there any particular kind you like to listen to when you're writing?
I love music, but I never listen to it when I read or write, since I find it distracting. So I only turn it on when I drive. My taste is quite eclectic, depending on my mood. Puccini, 10,000 Maniacs, Beyoncé, Nina Simone, Black Eyed Peas, Broadway musicals. Sometimes I'd give in to nostalgia and put on Teresa Teng-a Taiwanese singer hugely popular in Asia in the '70s and '80s-because my dad always listened to her on Sunday mornings when I was growing up. Sometimes, being a child of the late eighties, nothing makes my day more than a little Def Leppard or The Bangles.
What are your favorite kinds of books to give -- and get -- as gifts?
My favorite books to give are the ones that grab me out of nowhere and absorb me so completely that I can't wait to share them with others. In this way, I have made gifts out of Jhumpa Lahiri's The Interpreter of Maladies, Natsuo Kirino's Out, Sara Gruen's Water for Elephants, Julie Otsuka's When the Emperor was Divine, and Andrew Sean Greer's The Story of a Marriage
. My favorite books to get are the ones that I won't normally pick up on my own or haven't heard about, but they turn out to be moving and brilliant from page one. A few examples are Nien Cheng's Life and Death in Shanghai, Haruki Murakami's Kafka on the Shore, and Philip Gourevitch's We Wish to Inform You that Tomorrow We will be Killed with Our Families: Stories from Rwanda. I count these among some of my most treasured presents.
Do you have any special writing rituals? For example, what do you have on your desk when you're writing?
I'm obsessive-compulsive enough without having any writing rituals! Thankfully, I can write anytime and anywhere -- mostly in deserted coffee shops. I write incredibly slowly and I am my worst critic. For every word that you see on the page, I have probably considered twenty other words for it. I usually have a bottle of water or a cup of tea on the table. Eating something sweet helps stimulate my brain -- I prefer a cupcake -- though it certainly doesn't help my waist size.
Many writers are hardly "overnight success" stories. How long did it take for you to get where you are today? Any rejection-slip horror stories or inspirational anecdotes?
I had been writing steadily for almost a decade before I signed with my agent, Alex Glass, in 2008. Of Bees and Mist is actually my third finished manuscript. The first two -- I can now admit with a laugh -- were simply awful. I must have collected hundreds of rejections for them. They were devastating at the time, but now I think of them as the universe's way of saying that the books were not ready. The harshest came from an agent who said this about my first novel: "It's shallow, superficial, and silly. I cannot imagine anybody wanting it" -- and it was a book about racial persecution! I was twenty-eight at the time, and after that response, I fell into a depression and went through the requisite agent-hating phase. But slowly I began to write again. I wrote another novel -- which was also no good -- and it was again rejected left and right. Then I started Of Bees and Mist in 2004. By the time I finished it in December 2007, I knew in my heart that this one was special. Three weeks after I sent it out, Alex called me and said he wanted to work with me. He sold the book about a month later to my editor, Kerri Kolen.
What tips or advice do you have for writers still looking to be discovered?
Despite the many books and websites touting the contrary, I don't think there is one tried-and-true formula for getting published. Every writer must forge his or her own path, no matter how unusual or circuitous it may seem. Looking back on my own experience, I am amazed that I've gotten this far, since there have been plenty of obstacles along the way. English is not my first language; to this day, I always second-guess myself and battle an oft-crippling sense of inadequacy when I write. Moreover, due to my shyness and insecurity about my work, I never had the guts to enroll in a writing course. Similarly, I never joined a writers' group or attended a writers' conference. In fact, I kept my writing a secret and never showed it to my friends or family. After I finished Of Bees and Mist, a friend in New York by chance gave me a woman's email address who -- he thought but wasn't sure -- works with books." I queried that woman and she kindly agreed to read the manuscript. She was the first person apart from myself to ever lay eyes on Bees, and fortunately, she loved it enough to pass it along to her colleague, Alex. That woman was Lara Allen, who is now my foreign rights agent. In retrospect, I don't think anyone who's remotely connected to an agent or an editor should be the first reader of your manuscript, but in my case, it worked! My point, again, is that there is no set guide on how to get published, and you must simply persevere and follow your instincts. On paper, the odds were stacked against me, yet I still made it.
Reminiscent of Keith Donohue's The Stolen Child, Erick Setiawan's richly atmospheric debut is a beautiful, engrossing fable of three generations of women in two families; their destructive jealousies, their loves and losses, their sacrifices and deeply rooted deceptions, and their triumphs.
Of Bees and Mist is the tale of Meridia -- raised in a sepulchral house where ghosts dwell in mirrors, she spends her childhood feeling neglected and invisible. Every evening her father vanishes inside a blue mist without so much as an explanation, and her mother spends her days venomously beheading cauliflowers in the kitchen. At sixteen, desperate to escape, Meridia marries a tenderhearted young man and moves into his seemingly warm and charming family home. Little does she suspect that his parents are harboring secrets of their own. There is a grave hidden in the garden. There are two sisters groomed from birth to despise each other. And there is Eva, the formidable matriarch whose grievances swarm the air like an army of bees. In this haunting story, Setiawan takes Meridia on a tumultuous ride of hope and heartbreak as she struggles to keep her young family together and discovers long-kept secrets about her own past as well as the shocking truths about her husband's family.
Readers of magic-realist fiction will instantly be captivated by this richly evocative fairy tale. Of Bees and Mist takes place in a nameless town during a timeless era, where spirits and spells, witchcraft and demons, ghosts and clairvoyance -- both real and imagined -- are an everyday reality. Setiawan skillfully blends the real and the fantastical as he follows our heroine over a 30-year time span in which her love, courage, and sanity are tested to the limit.
Setiawan's debut novel spans 30 years in this heartfelt magical-realist story of two rival families living in a mystical world that transcends both time and place. Meridia is a lonely child; a mysterious incident when she was an infant has torn apart her parents, leaving them sharing nothing but a cold, mist-filled home. Not until Meridia meets the charmer Daniel, at age 16, does she finally feel loved. They marry and move in with his family and at first Meridia loves her life in Daniel's home. But she quickly learns of matriarch Eva's deceitful, manipulative ways and her power, both natural and supernatural, which she uses to control her family. When Meridia rebels against Eva, finding unexpected support from her parents, the rivalry solidifies and a lifelong battle begins. As time passes, Meridia faces heartbreak and betrayal, becoming a strong, fiercely independent woman. While filled with fortune-tellers, ghosts and unexplained phenomena, the relationships between the various characters are true to life so that fans of fantasy and fiction lovers alike are sure to enjoy this magical tale. (Aug.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.This is the story of the worst mother-in-law ever. A young woman from a bizarrely unhappy home finally thinks she will find freedom in marriage to the young man of her dreams, but it turns out that his family is even more bizarrely unhappy, and his mother is the most vicious harpy imaginable. Over the years, the two women engage in an epic battle over everything from food to family and nearly destroy all they hold dear in the process. All of this happens in an unnamed magical land (apparently inspired by the author's native Indonesia), where the bees are spies and the mist is sentient. Despite the feeling of "once upon a time," the characters have things like kitchen appliances and photographs, but women are still treated (and behave) like children. The story is almost operatic in scope—the only motivations are jealousy, greed, and thwarted love, and everyone has the emotional maturity of a 13-year-old. VERDICT This debut reads like a fairy tale for adults but somehow lacks the humanity of similar magical realist tales (e.g., Laura Esquivel's Like Water for Chocolate and Isabelle Allende's The House of the Spirits). Optional.—Jenne Bergstrom, San Diego Cty. Lib.
Magical spells, strange demons and one utterly impossible mother-in-law drive the plot of a moody fairy tale set in no particular time and place. Meridia, the heroine of this debut novel, grows up in a large and curious home: Its staircase has a habit of lengthening every so often, and powerful mists are capable of pulling unwanted visitors away from the front door. But beneath this strangeness lies some very common familial dysfunction. Gabriel and Ravenna, Meridia's parents, are barely on speaking terms, and rumors abound that Gabriel has taken a mistress. Understandably, Meridia grows up eager to escape. As a teenager she falls for Daniel, whose mother, Eva, busies herself tartly abusing nearly everyone she meets. When her ire is especially stoked, usually toward Meridia, Eva can call on a swarm of bees to punctuate her passive-aggressive fits of pique. This book is largely the story of a decades-long war between Eva and Meridia, and on occasion the magical setting effectively emphasizes how corrosive the relationship is. But the uncanny touches are haphazardly deployed, and the book is largely a flat narrative about in-laws who don't get along. Squabble follows squabble as Meridia attempts to escape Eva's clutches; Eva strikes back; and Daniel behaves as a milquetoast, uncertain of the truth of either woman's accusations. Those bees occasionally serve as a useful symbol of the wages of self-doubt-they tend to swarm in whenever Meridia questions Eva's judgment-but the mists and ghosts that appear seem to serve little purpose other than to modestly enliven a simplistic, repetitious story that makes Meridia's virtue nearly as tedious as Eva's viciousness. Setiawan unconvincingly inflatesa tiny narrative into a supernatural epic. Agent: Alex Glass/Trident Media Group
Loading...One
Few in town agreed on when the battle began. The matchmaker believed it started the morning after the wedding, when Eva took all of Meridia's gold and left her with thirteen meters of silk. The fortune-teller, backed by his crystal globe, swore that Eva's eyes did not turn pitiless until Meridia drenched them in goose blood three months later. The midwife championed another theory: The feud started the day Meridia held her newborn son with such pride that Eva felt the need to humble her. But no matter how loudly the townspeople debated, the answer remained a mystery and the two women themselves were to blame. Meridia said little, and Eva offered conflicting explanations, which confirmed the town's suspicion that neither one of them could actually remember.
The town first took notice of Meridia at the hour of her birth. That evening, following what would be remembered as twenty-seven hours of labor, she was extracted blue and wrinkled from Ravenna's womb. Her lungs, despite the ten slaps administered to her rump, refused to take even one breath. The midwife was about to bundle her away when Ravenna scolded: "What are you doing, woman? Give her to me!"
In her calm, ordinary voice, Ravenna told the baby that after putting her through eight months of discomfort and twenty-seven hours of unadulterated pain, after ruining her figure and swelling her breasts and wreaking havoc on her appetite, the least she could do was give her mother a farewell cry. "The tiniest squeak would do," said Ravenna. "A yowl would be even better." Ravenna went on for some minutes, rocking her daughter gently, and by the time she recited the intimate detailssurrounding the baby's conception "if you could only see the ungodly contortions your father had me do" Meridia spluttered a cough and inhaled her first breath.
"Stubborn little creature," chuckled Ravenna. "Do you think you're too good for this world?"
The midwife waited in vain for the baby to cry. Meridia gasped and grimaced, but one thing she did not do was cry. An hour later, shaking and scratching her head, the midwife departed. To every person she saw she confided, "One hundred babies delivered, and I've never seen one like her. Whether she is an angel or a demon only time will tell."
A few months shy of Meridia's first birthday, a blinding flash of light traveled at great speed in the dark of night and awakened her. There was a crash and a tumble, followed by a terrible scream, and suddenly she was snatched up from her bassinet and crushed against Ravenna's bosom. At the age of three, after Meridia learned enough words to speak, she tried to articulate to Ravenna what she had witnessed. All her mother did was sigh and mutter, "Some things are better left as dreams, child." Was it a dream then? Meridia wanted to ask, but Ravenna had turned to her vegetables and forgotten her. Her mother's back was straight and sturdy capable, Meridia suspected, of holding unknowable secrets.
The house at 24 Monarch Street was made of glass and steel. Perched on a high hill, it boasted a mansard roof, large latticed windows, and a veranda banked by daffodils. Stone steps climbed the sloping garden to the front door, over which an ivory mist hovered regardless of weather. The mist was a bane to peddlers and visitors alike, for it often held them suspended in midair, stole their hats, or chased them away with terrifying noises. Inside, the house obeyed a law of its own. The wood floors echoed no sound of footsteps, and people simply appeared in doorways without warning. The spiral staircase shortened and lengthened at random, and it could take toddling Meridia two seconds to two hours to go from one floor to the other. Mirrors were especially treacherous: In them Meridia could glimpse unfamiliar landscapes and all shapes of apparitions. Despite the large open windows, dusk never quite left the rooms; the sun could be blazing yet inside, the brightest objects looked dim and unappealing.
It was always cold in the house. Even at the height of summer with the fire going, Meridia was unable to keep warm. In the mornings, the nurse dressed her in heavy winter clothes as though a storm was brewing. At bedtime, the good woman wrapped her in two or three blankets and still her bones chattered. The cold emanated from one room, where at all hours a frosty wind fluttered curtains and rattled lamps. Meridia did not know how Ravenna could sleep in that room; her father, Gabriel, certainly never did. Meridia was four when she noticed that no words had ever passed between her parents. Five when she realized that the three of them were never in the same room at the same time. Gabriel spent his days in the study at the front of the house. Exactly what it was he studied, no one could say. In hushed tones, the nurse and the maids referred to him as a man of science, a celebrated scholar, an astute investor who had doubled his inheritance and was now living for the sake of knowledge. They were all terrified of him. No sooner did they sight his shadow than they trembled like leaves. Gabriel seldom spoke to them. A gesture or a look was all he needed to convey his command, which everyone but Ravenna followed like a mandate from heaven.
Meridia regarded her father with both fear and respect. A tall and elegant man, Gabriel was direct in manner, limited in patience, scrupulous in appearance. He had a firm chin and a grim mouth, and his dark eyes were severe and without warmth. He walked with a slight stoop, which gave him the appearance of a swooping raptor. Not once had Meridia heard him laugh. That he resented her for reasons that would not become clear until years later was the first thing she noticed about him. If he were to ever take her in his arms or speak a kind word to her, she would not have the slightest idea of what to do.
One day, despite the nurse's warnings, Meridia stole into the study when no one was looking. She had simply meant to peek around the door, but when she saw that Gabriel was out, she braved herself to enter. Though she had no previous recollection of being there, the room looked welcoming and familiar. She grinned at the towers of books that made up the walls, at the hanging maps and graphs full of numbers. Cabinet after cabinet was jammed with flasks, beakers, burners. Meridia skipped toward the massive desk by the window. Jars of growing seeds populated the surface, and they were all winking at her. She was reaching to touch them when a shadow fell across the desk.
"Who gave you permission to enter?"
Meridia turned and shrank. Her grin instantly melted from her face.
"Speak up! Don't just stand there drooling like an ape."
"I I "
Gabriel had not raised his voice, yet Meridia felt the whole world was screaming at her. Confronted with his immaculate suit and shiny oxford shoes, she felt dirty, small, purposeless. As she beseeched the maps and books for a way out, every object in the room darkened like an artifact of hate. Meridia dropped her eyes and did not dare lift them.
"You are five years old and quite capable of forming a sentence. Do you mean to stand there and insult me with your silence?"
"Papa I "
She was saved from further agony by her nurse, who ran into the study trembling with fright.
"It's my fault, Master. I didn't think "
Gabriel did not deign to look at her. "It is immaterial what you think or don't think. If I ever find her in here again..."
Quick for her considerable bulk, the nurse yanked Meridia out of the study. Once upstairs, she berated her charge soundly, but soon took pity and enfolded the child in her arms.
"You darling girl," she said with infinite tenderness. "Don't you mind your father too much. Some men can't help themselves when they're battered."
Her eyes pale and small, Meridia stood without moving. What had she done wrong? Why did Gabriel despise her like an enemy? Failing to stop the chill where his shadow had touched her, she wondered if all fathers were cruel and all mothers forgetful.
If the study was Gabriel's shrine, then the kitchen was Ravenna's sanctuary. In this large, bright room where the ceiling soared two stories high and the tiles were scrubbed four times a day, the lady of the house poured her venom into the endless meals she cooked. As she chopped, grilled, and boiled, Ravenna addressed the vegetables in a dark and private language, telling them of sorrow and despair. The fury of her pots and pans kept visitors away, while her air of absentmindedness spun a web of solitude about her. These endless meals, much more than her family could eat, were invariably donated to the poor. Apart from the kitchen, Ravenna entrusted the house to the care of the nurse and the two maids. This included the rearing of Meridia, whose existence she seemed able to recollect only with difficulty.
Ravenna's attire was limited to a plain black dress, which she kept protected with a white apron while she cooked. Long-sleeved and high-necked, the dress hid her pale arms and pointed shoulder blades, but did little to soften her appearance. Her face was so sharply angular it was saved from gauntness simply by her generous nose. Perfumed with verbena, her black hair was swept up into an implacable knot, so tight and bonelike it seemed a natural projection of her skull. Ravenna moved in a stiff and sudden manner, as though the aim of her action was decided at the tail end of a moment.
Due to her mother's forgetfulness, Meridia did not correctly estimate her date of birth until she was six. For years, using her own approximation, the nurse had always given her a present her one and only on July 2. However, on the morning of July 19 in her sixth year, Ravenna made a great clatter in the kitchen and summoned her. "Child!" she said breathlessly. "Why do you wear such a long face on your birthday? Look, I've made you a caramel cake. Go up to your room and put on a nice dress. I hope you don't mind that our party will be smaller this year." Meridia did not care for caramel and Ravenna never once held a party for her, but she did not trouble to correct her mother.
On the few occasions when they sat together in the living room, Ravenna would often drop her knitting and regard Meridia as if she had no idea who she was. Recognition, if it did occur, was swiftly followed by a tremor of shame. "Are you unhappy, child?" she would ask anxiously, sinking her chin to her bosom. Before Meridia could reply, Ravenna would snatch back her knitting and let fall a torrent of words: "Keep your spine stiff at all times. Never show anyone your tears. Never be at anybody's mercy. Nod if you're listening, child!"
Owing to her fear of infectious diseases, the nurse seldom allowed Meridia out of the house. Twice a month at most, when the sky was clear and the sun gentle, the good woman would take her to Cinema Garden for a brisk stroll. These outings were far from pleasurable for Meridia. Boiling inside a contraption of scarves and underclothes, knee socks and unyielding rubber boots, Meridia attracted as much jeering as pity as she staggered from one street to the next. The nurse, oblivious to her condition, would embarrass her further by remarking loudly, "Mind that dirty boy from the looks of him he hasn't seen soap in weeks...See that wart-ridden woman over there? You'll end up like her if you don't do as I say...You're sweating an awful lot, dear. Tell me if you feel an attack is coming on..." Ten minutes after they arrived at Cinema Garden, before Meridia had time to inspect the blossoms or feed the golden swans in the fountain, the nurse would insist that they return home immediately before a contamination could occur. All of Meridia's objections would be met as follows: "You're irritable. Are you sure you haven't touched anything? Let's leave before it gets worse."
One afternoon in Meridia's ninth year, after she had been housebound for three weeks, Ravenna suddenly switched off the stove, untied her apron, and declared that she would take her to the market. Curious to know what a market was, Meridia hurried to put on her shoes. The nurse attempted to fortify her with the usual garments, but Ravenna stopped her with a bellow. "Have you lost your mind, woman? It's hot enough outside to brand a cow!" Amid the nurse's scandalized look, they set off, Ravenna severe in her black dress, Meridia torn between a smile and a sense of disloyalty to the nurse. She soon forgot the latter, however, when Ravenna took her hand and led her across the street. To her amazement, no one laughed at her. Several onlookers even complimented Ravenna on her pretty daughter.
"I can't and won't argue with you," Ravenna answered solemnly. "Any woman would be lucky to have a darling like her."
Meridia blushed all the way down to her shoulders. It was the first time her mother had ever praised her.
That day, Ravenna took her to a hot and crowded square. Meridia's eyes flew wide at the sight of people jostling and arguing, stalls crammed with fruit and vegetables, sacks of rice and flour, spices sold in egg-shaped jars. There were fowls dead and alive, fish heaped on beds of ice, crabs in bamboo crates, meat suspended from iron hooks. A woman grew herbs out of her body thyme on her arms and rosemary on her chest which customers plucked fresh with their own hands. A tattooed man swallowed whole radishes and spat them out chopped, seasoned, and pickled. The air was thick with aromas both pleasant and odious and the ground was wet and dirty. Had it not been for Ravenna's hand, which she clutched tighter as they made their round, Meridia would have felt overwhelmed. The nurse would never have taken her to this place.
Somewhere along the butchers' aisle, Meridia lost her mother. A current of people swept her back; she was pushed and prodded, stepped on, then driven against her will up and down the square. Ravenna was nowhere in sight. Without her, Meridia went unnoticed, glared at by shoppers only when they found her in the way. The butchers' cleavers frightened her beyond measure, the ruthless thwack of blade against bone and meat chucked hastily onto grainy papers. Along the ground, blood formed a fly-spotted river. The louder Meridia shouted, the more the crowd roared to drown her.
Perhaps she cried for hours. Her throat was certainly hoarse when a hand brushed against her cheek.
"Why are you crying, little girl?"
Meridia looked up to find a well-dressed woman in a sea green hat. Choking back tears, she labored to explain, but the woman interrupted her.
"Don't worry. Your mother is only playing hide-and-seek. Come, we'll find her soon enough."
The nurse's warning about the ghastly things that happened to children who followed strangers went off in Meridia's brain. However, not knowing what else to do, she took the woman's hand and followed.
They searched the square twice without finding Ravenna. On their third try, just as the last ray of hope was fading in Meridia's breast, the scent of verbena came strongly to her nose. She froze in her tracks, then quick as lightning dropped the woman's hand and charged against the crowd. She had spotted Ravenna's implacable knot. So great, so complete was her relief that her heart felt like bursting.
Standing before a flower stall, Ravenna was carrying packages in her hand. She turned abruptly when she felt the urgent tug on her dress.
"What is it, child?"
Ravenna's face was calm and untroubled. Meridia could not speak, for tears had once again sprung to her throat.
"What is it? Why are you crying?"
"What do you mean?" rebuffed the woman in the sea green hat. "She's been looking everywhere for you!"
Ravenna shot her a puzzled look. "What on earth for? I've been right here all along."
Unable to contain herself, Meridia broke out sobbing. Ravenna bent down and wiped her tears with her sleeve.
"Tilt your chin up, child. Keep your back straight. Why are you letting the whole world see you cry?"
Meridia sobbed all the more. Tossing her head, the woman in the sea green hat snorted, then gave Ravenna a sharp look before leaving. This look, unnoticed by the mother, sliced deep into the daughter's heart.
Though Ravenna held her hand all the way home, Meridia took no pleasure in it. The stranger's look burned in her vision, and along with shame and sadness, it stirred a reckless dark feeling inside her. More than once she wished she had a cleaver to hurl, not at the woman in the sea green hat, but at the forgetfulness that imprisoned Ravenna in a different world. She wanted to strike until her arm was tired, scream until her voice was gone, and hound down whatever demon had erected this wall between them.Copyright © 2009 by Erick Setiawan
loading...
loading...
loading...
Terms of Use, Copyright, and Privacy Policy
© 1997-2009 Barnesandnoble.com llc
