Preface ix
Acknowledgments xiii
1 Bottoms Up 1
2 Watch for Those Warning Signs 7
3 What D'ya Wanna Be? 14
4 Biscuits Beware 20
5 Calling All Prince Charmings 26
6 Little Things Come in Big Packages 32
7 To Eternity and Beyond 39
8 Baking Time Is Over 44
9 Welcome to Motherhood U 49
10 Would You Like Flood Insurance with That? 54
11 Dandelions Have Feelings Too 59
12 How to Tour the Pacific without Crossing an Ocean 65
13 Red Pants or Bust 71
14 Is It Mid-morning Crisis or Am I Going Postal? 77
15 Come One, Come All 82
16 Supermom: Reality or Urban Myth? 87
17 Another One Bit the Dust 93
18 Willpower the Wimpy Way 98
19 Aren't Sequoias a Dying Breed? 103
20 Toddler-864, Mom-o 109
21 Hey There, Good Lookin'! Is Dinner Done Cookin? 119
22 How Did the First Generation Ever Get Starship Enterprise Off the Ground? 124
23 Summertime Blues 133
24 Frankly Speaking 139
25 If I Want to Get Over the Rainbow, Can I Use a Stepstool? 146
26 Onward and Upward 154
27 A Hard Situation 164
28 So This Is Nirvana? 170
Epilogue 175
About the Author 178